Sydney Sydney Sydney SYDNEY!!!!

Made it here 4 days ago and it's a bit chuffin chilly. Miss Denning will verify that definitely.... The rain has stopped for now but then it is winter I suppose. Different to Western Australia and Perth as you're back in a big city and the noise, smells etc are all different. People here growl at you rather than come and say hi except the drunk woman in the pub last night!! She did both I think....

Anyway got out on the water yesterday to go over to Manly and the ocean swell was huge, 10 foot waves to go over out by Sydney Head and nearly saw my breakfast again. Was good fun despite nearly decorating the place, waves bursting over side of boat and over the front, Dad you would have loved it. Manly is lovely and the sign as you walk in reads "Manly, 7 miles from Sydney, a thousand miles from caring" which I thought was excellent. You kind of expect everyone there to sort of float around, call you dude and the smell of hashish to be attached to everything, oh and obviously the obligatory surf board under the arm and arse hanging out of the back of the shorts man!!!! Waves were brilliant with really clean lines etc (sound like I know what I'm talking about don't I) Ems you would love it. Food superb and fab chilled atmosphere, yo chilly dog, far out hipster, man that's fly. Oops sorry, will just put my spliff down

Right back to the real world. Got warbled to the other night by this dynamic duo. Which one I hear you ask, well it was of course Robert and Jaiden playing me "I want to have a beer with Duncan", the other 2 were teaching me and about 100 other people how to play the didge, needless to say I am no clearer now than I was prior to that so wont be bringing any home with me!! Haven't got room in my bags anyway.......

Stage 1 Complete (Just About!!)

Off to Sydney tomorrow but am signing off from Perth with a much changed view from my first impressions a couple of weeks ago. I have had the last 6 days here and it's been fantastic. Last stop for me will be the WACA (Western Australia Cricket Association) ground this afternoon to have a chat with the Fremantle Doctor (look it up.....) who comes round every afternoon.

Have been over and had really good day in Freo, watched the sunset on the city from Kings Park, done the open top bus tour of the city (screams tourist, I know!!!!) and yesterday went down to the Valley Of The Giants, about 4 1/2 hours drive each way but so so worth it. It's basically a forest within a forest with a treetop walk that is 40 metres high, and these trees are huge..... To the right is fatboy standing in the base of one and you can walk through some - all very odd, but then it is Australia.............. need I say more!!!!

So, Western Australia....

It's been a real experience of Oz at it's best I reckon. It's f****** massive (can fit the whole UK into WA 5 times!!!!!) and it's only one state, its got the worlds most isolated city which is closer to Singapore than it is to Sydney (Perth by the way dippy!!!!), it's got the most diverse landscape for one state - forests in the south which are wet compared to the turquoise coast up near Exmouth which is hot and dry - only place I didn't like was Carnarvon as it's a bit of a dump but even that hole has a gorgeous beach! Best place has been Coral Bay although Cape Range National Park came a pretty close second. Have seen so many wild animals (nearly ran over another emu yesterday which shot out of the woods!!!! Scared the hell out of me.....) emus, kangaroos, loads of different parrots, eagles, dolphins, rays etc. Only thing I didn't see but wanted to was a whale shark but that would have cost a small fortune so leave that for next time. Happy to leave the flies behind though and the weather has been awesome, in 3 weeks I have had 3 cloudy days and it's rained twice. I hear its rained most of the last 2 weeks in Sydney.... oh and at home ha ha!! Bit of photo history of last 3 weeks below - note the one constant in them - yup, the sun...

And now off to a new state - New South Wales and Sydney and all it can offer. Back soon people - stay well and happy and see you some time soon. D x

Out Of The Ridiculous Van

Well I've done the 2 weeks in the van and it's been great - pity the poor sod who's got to clean all that sand out of it (and dead flies!!). Did about 3,600 km's in the 2 weeks or for you thickos, 2,250 miles which is not far off my usual work mileage but when it's done at 65 mph (it's not a quick vehicle, believe me - you have to have at least a km of clear road to even consider overtaking the roadtrains!! They're the huge lorries by the way....) and all you hear is constant wind and engine noise and feel every little bump in the road, it's knackering but great fun. Have had loads of people come up and ask about the van, "did you paint it?", "what's the quote?", it's from a Leonard Cohen song apparently, and some even taking pictures of it, bit too much attention for me as most of them are a bit wierd. Well they are Australian eh Nards!!!!.

Wierd thing about Western Australia is that it's full of Australians who are travelling and you don't get any Japanese which Eastern Australia is inundated with. Makes it a much more real trip in a way. The beaches are amazing and absolutely deserted and the landscape goes from lunar to desert to lush greenery to gorges to the coast, millions of termite nests in one part, loads of wandering kangaroos and emus in another and then this beautiful turquoise sea all the way along

Best part of the trip has to have been Coral Bay as it's so beautiful and the flies relented a bit there. Ningaloo Reef is so accessible from there and it's awe inspiring. The conservation and protection of the area is tantamount to the whole resort. There is so much to do there as well although decided that Whale Shark trips were too expensive (about 140 notes). Exmouth was really cool, saw dingoes and emus wandering around up there really close by too. Course as you're farting around trying to get the camera out they bugger off so above is best shot I got. Carnarvon didn't like at all, felt like a real alien there and I've never seen so many moths (some are about 3 inches long and when that lands on you...... change trousers time, Monkey Mia and Denham lovely but worst of the lot for flies, you get approx 100 on you at any one time and I'm not kidding!!!! Sunsets every evening are phenomenal and seas really clear (except at Carnarvon....). Oh and I saw a redback spider in Exmouth - really disappointing actually as they're only about an inch long, thought they would be big buggers that could shout at you.... Oh and the weather has been amazing.

Worst parts - flies obviously, they do your head in and do not leave you alone until it goes dark, then the mossies and moths start, doing the laundry, yawn expecially when you'd rather be on the beach or dolphin watching, boredom on the highway, I timed 27 minutes between seeing cars at one point.... and that's about it really.

Back in Perth now for a few days and will be going down to Valley of the Giants on Thursday and hopefully to an AFL game at the WACA on Saturday then on to Sydney on Sunday. Apparently its brass monkeys time over there at the mo!! Bugger......

Anyway hope all lwell with everyone and catch up soon. Dxx

Karl, you're hilarious............. Dream on and if my clothes are being worn by the tramps who hang around twickenham tesco when I get back, my BBQing skills are seriously developed, your nuts will be grilled and fed to them.

Lou no mountains on the coast here but will be going inland in a few days on wayback to Perth so you never know. Anyway shot of inside of the van there for you and its really comfy just a bit cramped when you're used to 4 / 5* hotel rooms!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Van Week 1

Well hello all. Week 1 of the van done and have been through a few places to say the least. Started off with 2 days in Perth which is quite a cool place but was absolutely pissing down when I got there (welcome to Australia slim) but cleared up on day 2. Went to cinema and saw Pirates 3 which was quite cool, first time I've been to the cinema since The Full Monty I think, then found an aussie pub for a couple of beers etc. Hostel was alright actually. Had my own room and bunch of decent people there. Day on Swan river over to Freo and then picked up van and onto the open road.

First stop was Jurien Bay about 350 kms up the road for 2 nights - lovely white sandy beaches and the Pinnacle Desert!! Now that IS a wierd place, really quiet and just sand and thousands and thousands of tall rocks in middle of nowhere, very erie...... Sunsets are magical and it's great to sit and watch them with a VB in the hand. Then on to Denham for 4 nights which is near Monkey Mia which is famous for dolphins. Beautiful place and will happily go back there if I get the chance to do this again. The dolphins are fed at dawn and I got there for it - fabulous and really nice start to a day. Took a catamaran cruise round bay and saw loads more dolhins and the occasional turtle but weather glorious. Spent 2nd and 3 rd days at MM too as it was a 600 k drive from Jurien so had got bit bored with the straight deathly quiet highway 1..... Believe me you just don't see any traffic and the road is dead straight - very bizarre for an M25 fan (right Mr Glass??). Finally had to leave and got up to Carnarvon yesterday which is quite a cool little place. One mile jetty at sunset is recommended (it's called that for a reason!!!!) but am now on my way to Coral Bay and Ningaloo Reef which is the target for these 2 weeks and can't wait. Much swimming, sunbathing and snorkelling to be done methinks. Have met some funny people and seen too many roo carcasses but so far so good. The van looks ridiculous (see attached) but is actually really comfy and has behaved so far. Lots of steak for dinner and salad (yes I know - me eating healthily - unbelievable isn't it, but I really am and feel a lot fitter and doing loads of exercise too -I'll be hiding behind lampposts when I get home - ah no, hang on, got to go to the States so that'll balls that all up!!).

Anyway will be back soon with more updates but hope all is well and keep in touch kids!!!!!

Is it me or isn't this supposed to be a forum for me to update everyone on what an amazing place I am in and make you all sick with jealousy, not somewhere for others to chat away????

Only messing - very amusing really. When I get to a computer that I can download pics to I will try and honour any requests. Rich I think I have performed beyond the call of duty for yours - just wait and see, H I'm still trying but may have to wait until Bondi for that, not many lifeguards up here just dolphins and sharks and turtles....

Any more requests and will see what I can do. Right off for a swim and a sunbathe, oh what a crappy existence......